Link to the podcast episode …
Mirroring is one way people with BPD try to create bonds with interesting people they meet. This involuntary behavior is a result of a sincere desire to be accepted. Individuals that display ‘mirroring’ do so automatically. They are imitating individuals that have shown them desirable qualities. Since the Pw/BPD has a shattered sense of self, they can easily switch from whatever persona they were once displaying & easily switch to a new one. ‘Mirroring’ is a specific aspect of borderline that makes it difficult for a Pw/BPD to tell you what they like or dislike. Borderlines have a hard time making decisions or sticking to specific hairstyles, fashion trends, or genres of music. One reason most people with borderline use ‘mirroring’ to secure a bond with someone is to decrease the chance of being abandoned or rejected. This aspect of borderline is what Sarah refers to as the “Chameleon Effect.” Sarah Myles is a person I chose to interview about the topic of ‘mirroring.’ Sarah is a writer originally from London that now resides in North Yorkshire, England.
A poem I’ve written
Mirrors can be tricky, don’t you think?
Sipping from a glass of truth but denying the drink.
Magically crafted so that we may truly SEE ourselves.
IMPROVE ourselves, or maybe even REMOVE ourselves?
I may have been crafted to show others who they are.
Most are unable to resist the hypnotizing charm.
Each one of us focused only on the things that we like.
Intertwined with this unintended slight,
I’m mastering the skill of being your type.
Life demands the borderline mirrors those that excite.
A demand they must adhere to for they fear the flight
Noticing all of these desirable traits
Each one of my behaviors begin to assimilate.
How easy it must be for my ‘looker’ to relate.
I submit myself to these effortless transformations.
No longer me, just various & interesting reflections.
Pieces of a broken slate of glass
My ‘self ‘ will always present itself last.
A painful instinctive reaction
I beg of you, do not leave me as just an empty reflection.
As I only believe, I am nothing without you.
I enjoyed my time immensely discussing borderline tendencies with Sarah Myles.
You can listen to our conversation here at the provided link.
Thank you, Sarah, for the opportunity to better understand the “Chameleon Effect” I look forward to future chats.